• Proposition 8 ruled unconstitutional. The U.S. 9th Circuit Court of Appeals ruled California’s same-sex marriage ban unconstitutional and had it overturned. In related news, Washington state plans on legalizing same-sex marriage by this week. Many people hope that same-sex marriage will be legalized on the federal level, while others claim it should be left up to the states. Personally, I don’t think the government, federal or state, has any business dictating what constitutes a marriage. If we’re going to make marriage a church and state issue, then we must conclude that it is primarily a church issue, not a state one. Marriage has, and always will be, considered a religious institution; therefore, it should be left up to churches and other religious organizations to decide their own definitions of marriage. A southern Baptist church should be just as free to deny marrying a gay couple just as an Episcopal church should be free to marry one. In fact, Mormons and other religious people who recognize polygamy should be free to marry as many spouses as they wish. Unfortunately, as long as the government controls the definition of marriage, the freedom to marry the one you love will always be constrained.
• Top Susan G. Komen official resigns after Planned Parenthood controversy. Vice President for Public Affairs Karen Handel resigned following the backlash against the decision to cut funding to Planned Parenthood—a decision that was later rescinded. I said this last week, and I’ll say it again: this was nothing more than a private organization ending its partnership with another private organization—nothing to get worked up over! Of course, if anything, this event proves that the “free market” works. Think about it: you have a business making a decision that the rest of the people disagree with, and then you have the people putting pressure on the business in order to change it. In other words, you have liberals—who often hate the market—using the market to their advantage. Ironic, don’t you think?
• Mitt Romney wins CPAC 2012 Straw Poll. After two years of Ron Paul consecutively winning the CPAC Straw Poll (and seriously, the only reason he didn’t win this year was because he didn’t attend), Romney won this year’s poll with 38 percent of the vote. Seriously, conservatives? This is the man you want representing conservatism: a massive flip-flopper who only opposes the things he once supported in order to gain the Republican vote? Then again, the Republican party has pretty much devolved into the party of massive hypocrites, so I guess it’s only fitting that he won.
• 30,000 surveillance drones could be flying over America by 2020. If you thought traffic light cameras were a sign that Big Brother was watching you, then you haven’t heard what the Federal Aviation Administration has planned. Congress passed the FAA Authorization Act this week, allowing the federal government to more easily fly unmanned spy planes within U.S. airspace. And here’s the punch line: officials say this won't be used as surveillance. Right! And the PATRIOT Act will only be used to monitor terrorists! Can the federal government please stop pretending it’s not trying to spy on its own citizens? They might as well quit the act and start implanting microchips into our brains. We all know that’s their ultimate wet dream!
• Rand Paul offers legislation to strip foreign aid to Egypt. The son of the great Ron Paul suggested stripping Egypt of foreign aid until it releases 19 American protesters from its custody. "Right now innocent American citizens who work for pro-democracy organizations in Egypt are being held hostage. There really is no other way to put it. They are not being allowed to leave Egypt and are facing trial from a military government,” Paul said. And this, ladies and gentlemen, is how you influence countries to do the right thing. You don’t bomb them with missiles. You simply refuse to do business with them. That’s the beauty of noninterventionist foreign policy: you get things done without spilling a single drop of blood.
• Fox Business cancels Judge Andrew Napolitano’s Freedom Watch. (Enter string of profanities here!) The Judge’s show, along with several others, has been scrapped in favor of reruns of other shows. The Judge will still make appearance on other Fox News shows. Either way, this is one more reason not to watch Fox “News.” But what else can you expect from an overtly neoconservative propaganda machine but to fire it’s only libertarian-leaning conservative? This was only to be expected when the Judge said that Bush and Cheney (the very asses Fox “News” has been kissing for over eight years) should have been indicted as war criminals. Yup. After that, it was only a matter of time till the good Judge lost his career with Fox. But at least we still have John Stossel!
Dumbasses of the Week
Runner-Up: Andrew Rosenthal (New York Times): In his editorial “Stop Compromising,” Rosenthal criticized Obama’s plan to compromise on his contraceptive mandate: “I understand that the Catholic Church in particular feels strongly about birth control, but this isn’t a theocracy.” Allowing religious organizations to be exempt from a contraceptive healthcare mandate if they object to contraception is not a theocracy. Now if Obama had thrown out the entire mandate on behest of the Catholic Church, then that would be a theocracy. Actually, in a true theocracy, contraception would be banned simply because the Pope said so. But we don’t live in such a country, now do we? We live in a country where people are free to follow their own religious beliefs—and that includes not being forced to do something that goes against their beliefs.
3rd Place: Melinda Henneberger (Washington Post): Separation of church and state goes both ways: not only does it prevent the church from interfering with the state, but it also prevents the state from interfering with the church. In the case of Obama’s contraceptive mandate, church/state separation prevents the state from outlawing contraception due to religious dogma, and it also prevents the state from forcing religious people who object to contraception from using it. It is this religious freedom, among many other freedoms, which has made America great. But unfortunately, many people disagree with this. Appearing on Hardball with Chris Matthews, Washington Post’s Melinda Henneberger had this to say concerning religious freedom: “Maybe the Founders were wrong to guarantee free exercise of religion in the First Amendment but that is what they did and I don't think we have to choose here.” Good grief! It seems whenever somebody uses their freedom to do something that liberals disagree with, liberals always blame the Founding Fathers. “Well, if the Founding Fathers knew about automatic assault rifles, they wouldn’t have given us the right to bear arms!” or “If they knew how fast misinformation could travel across the internet, they wouldn’t have given us free speech!” In this case, because religious organizations are exempt from offering something that goes against their beliefs, the Founding Fathers were wrong to give us religious freedom. I shudder to think what would happen if liberals ever invented time travel.
2nd Place: Rick Santorum: Seems like ol' Ricky boy suffers from foot-in-mouth disease, considering how he’s always putting his foot in his mouth. This time, it’s over the military—more specifically, women in the military. In response to a question concerning the decision to put more women on the front lines, Ricky has this to say: "I think that could be a very compromising situation, where people naturally may do things that may not be in the interest of the mission because of other types of emotions that are involved. It already happens, of course, with the camaraderie of men in combat, but I think it would be even more unique if women were in combat.” Why would it be more unique? Because they’re women? C’mon! There are plenty of women out there who can more than handle the stress of combat, and plenty of men who can’t. In fact, who’s willing to bet that if forced into combat, Ricky boy would sissy up once the grenades start flying over his head?
1st Place: Congressman John Fleming (R): With the crazy crap happening these days, it’s sometimes hard to tell the difference between news and satire. However, one should be able to tell that an article from The Onion is satire. Not Congressman John Fleming. On his Facebook page, he posted a year-old Onion article called “Planned Parenthood Opens $8 Billion Abortionplex” which he confused for a real article. Even if Fleming was unaware that The Onion was a satire magazine, he should have told from the title alone that the story was satire. Our politicians, ladies and gentlemen: easily fooled by The Onion. Doesn't it make you want to trust these people with more power?