Nuggets of Wisdom

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Top 11 Most Disturbing MLP:FiM Fandoms (Honorable Mentions)

I know I must be killing you all in suspense making you wait another day for the #1 entry. I’m doing this for two reasons. First, I haven’t written it yet. (Yeah, embarrassingly enough, the entry isn’t ready today for no good reason other than I’m a lazy bum. But don’t worry: I guarantee it will be ready by tomorrow.)

And secondly, I wanted to feature a few fandoms that didn’t make the official list but are still worth mentioning. So without further ado, here are some honorable mentions:

Image from Minecraft Forum.

Kentucky Fried Pony

As I mentioned in my Cupcakes entry, there were plenty of stories that followed which tried to emulate it but failed to do so. This is one of those stories.

In Kentucky Fried Pony, the Mane Six are invited to the Apple Family’s house for a chicken dinner. (Wait! Since when do ponies eat chicken? Aren’t they herbivores?) Everything seems normal enough until something in the food causes them to black out. The Apple Family then proceeds to take the bodies and chop them up in preparation for another dinner with unsuspecting ponies. (The chicken was really ponies? What a twist!)

And that’s the entire story. I know. Not much to it, and thus not much to talk about. The narrative is extremely rushed, the details are lacking, and the murder comes without buildup and goes without notice, almost like a drive-by shooting. Everything comes and goes in the blink of the eye, which contrasts with the overall suspense of Cupcakes.

I left this story off the list not only because there’s not much to talk about, but because overall it’s not that disturbing. Don’t get me wrong. Seeing Apple Jack and her family go Texas Chainsaw Massacre on her friends is shocking, but if anything, it’s like the shock you get from a bee sting: sure it catches you by surprise and causes some pain, but you eventually get over it and forget about it—much like this story.

And there are other stories I could have discussed such as Rarity’s New Dress and Rarity’s Dinner, but as with this one, they simply fail to emulate the horror of Cupcakes (unlike the other two fanfics at the top of my list).

Image from MLP Wiki.

Foalin’ Around With The CMC

There are bronies out there who really love the Cutie Mark Crusaders—and I mean really love them. Having a fetish for multi-colored ponies is disturbing enough, but having a fetish for underaged multi-colored ponies is sick. Just sick.

This story involves a nameless male human who is magically transported to Equestria and later given the task of babysitting the Cutie Mark Crusaders. (Don’t ask me why Apple Jack or Rarity would give a random human stranger the responsibility of looking after their little sisters.) When the girls decide to obtain their cutie marks in mud wrestling, as can be expected, it’s straight to the tub with them for a bath. What isn’t expected is what transpires next, which I won’t summarize since I don’t feel comfortable describing child porn. All I have to say is that it’s blatantly obvious in a later scene that the author’s favorite pony is Sweetie Belle.

I left this one off the list for obvious reasons. I fear that merely mentioning it involves breaking some sort of child pornography law. I find it disturbing that folks like Megasweet and the guy who wrote this fanfic (HotSauce) not only have the hots for underage filly flank, but they also have a following because of it. I don’t get it. Why aren’t these people in jail.

Image from PonyChan.


I didn’t learn about this artist until after I started making this list. I was considering adding him to it, but didn’t for two reasons.

First, both his deviantART gallery and Tumblr account have since disappeared for reasons unknown, though it could very well have been the nature of some of his art. (Hint: like Johnjoseco and Megasweet, he also liked pony poon!)

And secondly, there’s really not much to say about him other than his artwork is really creepy. It has to be the brushstrokes, which make the characters depicted look realistic, and creepily so. Add in macabre and surreal subject matter, and you have one creepy artist.

And here’s just a few select choices of what little art I could scavenge:

Image from Ponibooru.

Image from Twenty Percent Cooler.

Image from Ponibooru.

Image from MLP Fanart Wiki.

Image from GameInformer.

Man is this art creepy!

But not as creepy as...

Image from Quick Meme.

Pony Sex Toys

They exist. From fleshlights to full-body sex dolls, they exist.

Is there anything else I need to say about that?