Okay, so Jeff Dunham's latest special "Minding the Monsters" may not be spine-tinglingly frightening, but it is gut-wrenchingly hilarious!
Jeff: So, where you're from, are there female suicide bombers?
Achmed: We're pushing for it.
Achmed: It's a lot easier than divorce.
Jeff: So how did the [wedding] service go?
Walter: Well, the worst part was when the minister asked if anyone objected and no one would listen to me.
Jeff: Maybe they couldn't hear you?
Achmed: Hey, you're right. You weren't there!
Bubba J: I wanted to be a ghost, but somebody backstage told me a redneck in a white sheet weren't a good idea.
Jeff: Do you really think "Batnut" scares criminals?
Peanut: Of course, especially if they have a nut allergy. Taste my honey-roasted justice!