Nuggets of Wisdom

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Nightly Frights: The Splinter

Spongebob Wiki

In hindsight, I feel like I shouldn’t have included the "Squidward’s Suicide" creepypasta among my Nightly Frights last year. For one, it’s a cliché creepypasta that most people and their grandmothers are already familiar with—up there with the other notable creepypasta such as Slender Man and Ben Drowned.

Also, this fake Spongebob episode isn’t as scary as real SpongeBob episodes. Pretty much every other modern Spongebob episode from "A Pal For Gary" and "Squidward’s Visit" makes "Squidward’s Suicide" look as frightening as a three year old jumping out from behind a corner with a bunny mask and yelling “boo!”

But, of course, the worst offending modern Spongebob episode, hands down, is "The Splinter"—because when I think of a child-friendly cartoon, I think of an up-close grotesque shot of Spongebob’s infected finger oozing green pus.

Since I can’t (legally) share the episode, I’ll do the next best thing and share Mr. Enter’s review of it: