Nuggets of Wisdom

Monday, August 3, 2015

Sexist Air Conditioners Broke My Brain

Many of you have probably been wondering why I haven’t been writing any blog posts lately. The reasons are many, but one main reason is that, sometimes, I just don’t know what to say about recent news stories. It’s one thing when the story’s a recurring trend like police brutality (how many times can you say "this is intolerable and we should do something about it"?), but it’s quite another when it’s about something so stupid that words fail me.

Take, for instance, the title of the following op-ed piece: “Air conditioning in your office is sexist”.

Yes, that is a real title of a real column. Yes, that was written by an actual human being. Yes, that was published in a major publication. Yes, the editor of that publication read it over and thought it was fit for print. No, this publication wasn’t satirical like The Onion. It was The Telegraph, the British equivalent to our New York Times.

In case you’re curious, the opinion piece in question postulates that there is a sexist conspiracy to keep the air conditioning high in office buildings in order to drive women out of the work force. That’s a hasty summary, but still rather accurate. Again, this was published in a major news publication.

Words fail me. They truly fail me. I’m at a loss for words. I don’t know where to even begin. What do I write in response to that other than...

Because that seems to be the only appropriate counter-argument.

This isn’t even a feminist talking point like “women are paid 77 cents for every dollar” which is easily refuted by citing empirical evidence to the contrary. What evidence do you cite to refute the notion that air conditioners are sexist? Again, all you can say is “no, you’re wrong.”

And even if this was something that could be “refuted” with evidence, why would I even bother trying to refute it? Anyone who truly believes this insipid talking point isn’t going to listen to what I have to say, and people who already know this is bullshit don’t need to have anything said to them. Any attempt to say anything would be futile.

I want to say that this is everything wrong with modern feminism, but frankly, this isn’t the stupidest thing feminists have said. It’s not the stupidest thing that a human being has written. It’s not even the stupidest thing that was written this year!

Within the past few months, paranoid parents have claimed that autism is caused by measles vaccines and cured by bleach enemas. University professors have taught that cancer isn’t a disease, but rather, a “survival mechanism”. Social activists have claimed that economists are sociopaths. Cops have blamed infants for being blown up by grenades thrown by SWAT teams. Politicians have claimed that people are starving because we have 23 choices of deodorant. Government agencies have spent millions in taxpayer money studying the cause of obesity in lesbians.

And again, that was all within the past year alone. I’ve been blogging for up to six years now. You can only imagine the stupid things I’ve seen and read since then. You can imagine the toll such collective stupidity can take on my psyche.

The sad part is all of that stuff wasn’t said by morons, believe it or not. It wasn’t uttered by mouth-breathing trailer trash. It was all said by educated people, or allegedly educated! This is what passes as “informed, enlightened opinions” these days. That depresses me! If this is what’s fit to print and publish, then I don’t ever stand a chance having my work published, because I have far too much integrity and intelligence.

Seriously, sometimes I wonder if I accidently woke up in an alternate dimension where everything is more backwards and insane than Wonderland. Shit! Even the Mad Hatter would claim that this dimension is too insane for him. How is this even real life at this point?

So, yes, sorry I haven’t been writing that often. Crap like this gives me serious writer's block. There’s nothing I can say to refute it (other than “this is stupid!”), and even if I do refute it, who the hell is going to read what I have to write? If people sincerely believe this shit, then nothing I can say will convince them otherwise.

There are just too many times when I feel like Arin from Game Grumps. Sometimes, you have to draw a line in the sand, and ask yourself, “What am I willing to put up with today?” NOT FUCKING THIS!