Saturday, October 31, 2015
Thursday, October 29, 2015
By now, I’m sure you’ve all read my post about the fan artist who nearly attempted suicide after being harassed by Tumblr SJWs over her “problematic” art. You’d think that these “social justice warriors”, who boast of being “decent human beings”, would have been forced to re-evaluate their values and priorities over this situation, and in doing so, gain some humanity.
You’d be wrong.
This is what one of her harassers wrote to her after she gave an update on her status in the hospital:
Word fail me.
They simply fail me. Which is why I’m going to use the Nostalgia Critic to express my sentiments exactly:
You’d be wrong.
This is what one of her harassers wrote to her after she gave an update on her status in the hospital:
Word fail me.
They simply fail me. Which is why I’m going to use the Nostalgia Critic to express my sentiments exactly:
Wednesday, October 28, 2015
Before there was JonTron, before there was the Angry Video Game Nerd, and even before there was YouTube, there was a cable television channel called G4 TV that was dedicated to video games. One of their most popular shows was X-Play, a video game review show that mixed reviews with comedy sketches—you know, like most modern day internet reviewers!
Back when I was in high school and early college, this channel was my favorite next to Cartoon Network. The fact that there was an entire channel dedicated to video game news and reviews was simply golden for me, and I watched it religiously.
Sadly, with the advent of high-speed internet and video streaming services such as YouTube, G4 TV, and X-Play respectively, began to sink in the ratings, and both are no more (though both of their hosts, Adam Sessler and Morgan Webb, remain active in the video game community). The void the channel and show left have since been filled by online video game reviewers, which, you could say wouldn’t be able to make their craft possible without X-Play making the review-mixed-with-comedy-style popular.
One of the sketches created by X-Play was a horror movie trailer spoof with Mario as the serial killer. It’s ridiculous, to say the least, but still rather humorous. This time, Mario is rated M for Murder!
Tuesday, October 27, 2015
I love Steven Universe. I’d say I even love it more than My Little Pony. The show really is that good, if only because the storytelling goes places where I wish MLP would go.
The SU fandom, on the other hand, I can do without.
It's the polar opposite of the MLP fandom. While the brony community obviously contains "dudebros", the SU fandom is infested with Tumblr feminist SJWs, and as is typical with the SJW lynch mob, they are quick to turn on anybody or anything they consider to be “problematic.”
I already highlighted some of the SJW hysteria in a previous post about how they harassed one artist who dared to draw Garnet with—gasp!—lighter skin. They’ve also been known to attack white cosplayers who dress as Garnet or Amethyst, claiming that the costumes are “racist” and “culturally appropriating people of color”—which would be accurate, if by “people of color”, they mean red and purple!
Recently, however, the SU community—or rather, the SJW lynch mob that infest it—have crossed the line with the harassment of one particular artist, and it makes me as hot in rage like an eternal flame, baby!
If I were a little kid, and I saw a small creature that “looked like a furby” pop out of my bed with big eyes and even bigger teeth, I probably wouldn’t be trying to befriend it. Either I would be screaming for my parents to save me, or beating the crap out of it with any blunt object I could reach.
But, somehow, someone actually managed to encounter such a creature as a little kid. The little bugger calls himself “My Widemouth”, and he only wants to have "fun" with you, playing fun games like “jump out of the window onto the invisible trampoline below—which is real, I swear!” or “lets juggle with really sharp knives, because what could possibly go wrong.”
He’s just a lovable small ball of fur who wants to be your friend forever and ever, and one day, he may even take you down the road that goes into the woods. Where exactly does that road lead to? Well, you’re probably better off not knowing. If you do want to know, check out the video below:
Initially, I was going to share Mr. Enter’s recent review of Drawn Together: The Movie as a “Nightly Fright”, but I decided not to cheat that way and simply share the review as it is. Seriously, though, what could be scarier than a movie that wrecks someone's psyche to the point where he’s going to abstain from reviewing for a good week or two? (Man, I feel sorry for the guy!)
Monday, October 26, 2015
We conclude this series of Halloween-themed VGM Monday posts with a scary music selection from my all-time childhood favorite: Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time. You’d probably assume that I would have chosen the music from the Shadow Temple. That music is, indeed, very creepy. It’s also very obvious. Which is why I’m showcasing something less obvious: the music to the Forest Temple.
Saturday, October 24, 2015
Man lives in the sunlit world of what he believes to be reality; but, there is, unseen by most, an underworld, a place that is just as real, but not as brightly lit: a darkside! (Or at least that's what Tales From The Darkside tells us.)
What is true for reality is equally true for the internet. What we consider to be the “world wide web” is merely a small, select portion of websites, accessible to the public and searchable by most search engines. These sites, however, are but the tip of an iceberg, with the remainder existing in the dark, icy depths—in a place commonly known as the “deep web.”
What exists in the deep web? The safest answer is that it consists of websites and content that are so far removed from the mainstream that they remain uncategorized and unsearchable by most major search engines.
The not so safe answer?
Well, if you want a glimpse for yourself, then feel free to watch the following video, but do so at your own risk. What will be shown cannot be unseen. If this is a risk you are willing to take, then by all means, leave your sanity at the door, but be warned: you may not be able to so easily retrieve it!
Friday, October 23, 2015
I remember when my music teacher showed my first grade class this video during Halloween. I’m not sure what made her think that an animated music video about spooky scare skeletons that send shivers down your spine would be appropriate for little kids, but to this day, it’s an experience that I vividly remember.
Behold the cognitive dissonance of the average Bernie Sanders supporter!
They want to raise taxes on the rich, but they also want them to stop hoarding their wealth in offshore bank accounts.
They want corporations to pay a higher tax rate, but they also want them to stop sending our jobs overseas.
They want increases to minimum wage, but they also want to keep their entry-level jobs.
They want teachers to be paid more with increased salaries, but they also want “free” education.
They want public-sector workers to be able to unionize, but they also want bad cops who shoot and brutalize innocent civilians to be fired.
They want to abolish world hunger, but they also want to ban GMOs.
They want to end climate change, but they also want to do so using the biggest polluter on Earth.
They want to stop Donald Trump from closing the borders, but they also support Bernie in opposing open borders.
Thursday, October 22, 2015
Joe Biden announced that he’s not running for president. That’s quite a shame. He would have been the funniest thing about the elections. (Aside from Trump, of course!) His gaffes were true comedy gold. Anyone remember “Stand up, Chuck”? If not, here’s an “accurate” re-enactment:
Wednesday, October 21, 2015
H.P. Lovecraft needs no introduction. He's an iconic master of American horror whose name is up there among others such as Poe and King—well, maybe not King because he’s an overrated hack!
One of my favorite of his short stories is "Pickman’s Model." The story is narrated by an art proprietor who tells of his visit to an artist named Pickman. The artist in question is famous for creating macabre paintings of ghoulish, twisted creatures, the very features of which appear realistic enough to have almost derived from a feverish nightmare. What inspires such dark yet strangely realistic artwork? Well, I won’t give away the ending, but it is a twist that most of you probably saw a mile away.
While this short story did inspire a segment on Ron Sterling’s Night Gallery, I’d recommend reading the short story over the television adaptation, as the latter hardly does justice to the former.
By all means, read the story here for yourself. Just make sure you're not reading it at night, and if you are, by all means, don't go outside until day breaks.
I'm not going to post the entire story here, but allow my to post an excerpt which describes the monsters in question:
I don’t really care for “lost episode” creepypastas, mostly because they’re usually, blatantly fake. Almost anyone can make up a story about an unreleased cartoon episode that was too “hardcore” to be aired on television, and make up the most grotesque and surreal details surrounding it. As such, they come across as transparently fake. So if I’m going to feature a lost episode creepypasta, I might as well feature the granddaddy that inspired all others: Suicide Mouse.
It's October 21, 2015. As every geek and their mother has already pointed out, this is the exact date that
Despite the apparent lack of hoverboards, technology has still vastly progressed since Back to The Future: Part II, and while we may not have our shoes lace themselves so we can ride our hoverboards home to hydrate a pizza, we are making video conference calls, unlocking doors with our fingerprints, watching multiple programs on wall-mounted flat-screen televisions, and playing video games without our hands.
Here's a video highlighting a few of the technological advancements that BTTF:P2 predicted that will make you exclaim “Great Scott!”:
Tuesday, October 20, 2015
Unless you haven’t been paying attention to Twitter for the past 24 hours (in other words, you have a life!), you probably know that #BoycottStarWarsVII was a thing that existed. Why did it exist? Because angry racist trolls were upset that the upcoming Star Wars movie was allegedly pushing “cultural Marxism” and “white genocide” because—gasp!—the movie had a diverse cast!
Yes. I’m serious. This actually happened.
If there’s one thing I especially applaud modern cartoons for, it’s their ability to make viewers feel a wide range of emotions, especially within single episodes.
In the past, most cartoon shows were only interested in entertaining their viewers, mostly through comedy. Now it seems almost as if cartoons have become self-aware and realized that they’re an art form, and as art, they have the ability to make you feel anything and everything.
And, boy howdy, have some of my favorite cartoons been putting me on an emotional rollercoaster ride lately.
Monday, October 19, 2015
Many gamers will claim that Mario Kart is their favorite racing game, but as for me, Diddy Kong Racing for the Nintendo 64 will always be my personal favorite. With three different ways to race (karts for land, hovercrafts for water, and airplanes for air) and an entire adventure story mode, how could anyone not like this game?
For this entry, I’m focusing on spooky music that’s more “whimsical” than “scary.” And how fitting is it that the music comes from the “haunted” race track, Haunted Woods?
Sunday, October 18, 2015
If you’re one of those evangelicals who hands out Chick Tracts instead of candy, please don’t do that! At least give the children something to rot their teeth while they rot their minds on your blatant propaganda.
But in all seriousness, Chick Tracts are rather creepy when you see past the overly-politicized Gospel message. Perhaps his trippier comics tend to be those written especially for Halloween. This one is no exception. If anything, it’s the rule!
TL;DR: Teen boy goes into a haunted house to get the hell scared out of him with a scene of hell. He runs outside, gets run over by a car, and in a sick twist of karma, is sent to the hell that he had tried so hard to escape. What a tweest!
Saturday, October 17, 2015
Do you like list videos? I know I do. A lot of people apparently do, which is why there are so many list video channels like alltime10s, Danger Dolan, and Matthew Santoro. Heck, it’s one of the reasons why Watch Mojo manages to be so lucrative.
But with so many list videos and channels on YouTube, the market seems nearly oversaturated with them, to the point where many topics seem overdone. As such, it’s a breath of fresh air when you come across a list video channel that’s not only more original, but also puts far more effort into their video. Such is the case with Tats Top Videos.
Friday, October 16, 2015
Five years. It has been five years since My Little Pony first premiered. And it was on the exact same date that the series premiered, October 10, that this episode premiered, finally providing closure for a series-long story arc. And really, with this entire season focusing on cutie marks, was this episode even remotely a surprise?
Since the very start of the series, the fandom has speculated about when and how the Cutie Mark Crusaders would finally receive their cutie marks. Which one would receive theirs first? When would they receive it? How? What will their cutie marks look like? How will it affect the group once they receive their marks? Would they even receive their marks at all? Well, after five long years, all of these answers have been sufficiently answered.
Honestly, I could not think of a more fitting way for the CMC to receive their marks and close their story arc which the entire series has been building upon. For five long years, these three fillies have strived to find their place in life and discover what their cutie mark will be. Not only did this episode provide just that, but so much more.
Not only did we see them receive their marks, but we also saw much-needed character development for an otherwise much hated character. I’ll still stand by the fact that Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon are my least favorite characters, but this episode managed to make me develop some sympathy towards them. Not only did Silver Spoon finally diss Diamond Tiara after being on the receiving end of her abuse, but we finally receive some insight into Diamond’s personal life. I’m not going to excuse her past behavior based upon her upbringing, but at least we have better understanding of it.
And how apropos was it that this episode was a musical? Of course such a major development would call for one. I would say that this episode is on par with Magical Mystery Cure, if not better; and as that episode showed that there was more for Twilight in the future even after becoming an alicorn, there is still more in store for the CMC, whose new sworn duty will be to help other ponies discover the true meaning of their cutie mark.
It seems as though past episodes, especially this season, have been providing closure to many character arcs within the series. Twilight has become the alicorn princess of friendship. Rarity has received her Canterlot boutique. The CMC have received their cutie marks. The only thing left is for Rainbow Dash to become a member of the Wonderbolts, and at this part, she’s at least unofficially one. This all begs the question: with so many arcs wrapping up, is the series itself coming to a close, or is it as the last song in the episode claims that this is where one journey ends and another begins?
Thursday, October 15, 2015
If you were visiting Chicago back in 1893, you’d probably be advised not to stay the night at the World's Fair Hotel. No, it’s not because of the bedbugs! Those were all too common back in the 19th Century. No, you wouldn’t want to stay the night there because, chances are, you wouldn’t make it out alive. That’s because the hotel was infamously known as the “Murder Castle”, and it was owned by America’s first serial killer.
Wednesday, October 14, 2015
And now we shift from abject horror to psychological horror. Instead of scary stories about ghosts or zombies, we have a little kid telling his classmates an "innocent" story about a man in the woods. But is it really innocent? It can hardly be so if it causes a teacher to lose his reputation, his job, and inevitably, his own sanity.
If there’s one nice thing I have to say about last night, it was that the Democrats had far less “drama” at their debate than the GOP has had at theirs. Hillary and Bernie may be heated rivals, but at least they were civil enough to respect each other’s opinions and even shake hands. If any of the GOP candidates were to shake anything, it would be the breath out of their opponents. I’m no fan of the Democrats, but at least I can somewhat admire their civility.
Otherwise, it was the typical left-wing circle jerk you’d come to expect from such an event, with establishment Democrats (looking at Hillary) promising to bust the big banks (even though they bailed them out), end mass incarceration (even though they aided it), and bring an end to war (even though they approved of it).
If there was one candidate I somewhat liked, it would be Jim Webb. I’m not voting for the man by any means (and he’s obviously never going to get the ballot), but he would be someone I’d at least feel comfortable voting for, especially since he was the only one there to defend the Second Amendment: “There are people at high levels in this government who have bodyguards 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. The average American does not have that and deserves the right to be able to protect their family.”
If you want a more in-depth analysis of how well the candidates stand up next to the facts, then check out PolitiFact or FactCheck for the record. And you want to see more of my thoughts on last night’s debate, check out my Twitter feed.
Tuesday, October 13, 2015
Once again this year, I will be showcasing several Chick Tracts, notorious evangelical propaganda that is both intentionally horrifying and unintentionally hilarious. I used to read these as a little kid, and even to this day, I still experience devious enjoyment from them—albeit ironically!
The very first tract I want to highlight is an interesting one. The premise of this comic is that a vampire eventually turns from his vampirism after receiving Jesus in his heart—or lack thereof. This one was actually created around the same time that Twilight was popular. I wonder if there is a connection here.
The first Democratic debate is being held tonight at 8pm on CNN. If you’re a sadomasochist who enjoys torturing yourself with bad unintentional comedy, then tonight’s your night. Just be sure to spare what little sanity you have by getting plastered before and during the debates. Reason Magazine suggests the following cocktails:
Monday, October 12, 2015
Chrono Trigger is undoubtedly the best RPG of all time. There are countless reasons why this is so—the dynamic graphics, the revolutionary battle system, the complex storylines with multiple endings.
Since this is Video Game Music Monday, I might as well focus on the video game music, seeing as how this game has the greatest SNES soundtrack of all time. And since I’m focusing on scary music, let’s focus on the creepiest music in the game: Magus’ Castle Theme.
Once upon a time, there were two sisters who lived in the countryside. One day, they came across a gypsy girl playing the most beautiful drum. When the girls asked if they could have the drum, the gypsy girl replied that she would gladly give it to them if they acted more rotten than they’d ever acted before. And so the girls return home and spent the rest of the day misbehaving, to the point where their poor mother warns them that, if they keep acting up, she will move away, and a new mother will come to replace her—one with glass eyes and a wooden tail. Will the girls learn to behave, or will they continue their bad behavior until they get their new drum—or new scary mommy?
Sunday, October 11, 2015
Mind control has always been a particularly long-lasting sci-fi horror trope—and for good reason: nothing could be more terrifying than an outside force taking over your mind and forcing you to lose control of it and, in turn, yourself. It's a sci-fi trope that exists now, and it's one that has existed since the early days of horror comics, which has brought us this particular ghoulish (or rather, cartoonish) comic, Brain Bats from Venus:
I know I have been lagging with my Pony Recaps, since it’s been five episodes in and I still haven’t written a single recap. Don’t fret! I do plan on writing one for the most recent episode sometime later this week.
Because really, how can I not? This episode…it’s just…wow!
Saturday, October 10, 2015
Zombies seem to be the biggest thing in the media these days. From The Walking Dead to The Last Of Us, it’s nearly impossible to look for a movie or video game without coming across something zombie-related. Zombies are infecting everyday entertainment like, well, actual zombies!
Though as unsettling (if not entertaining) as a zombie apocalypse would be, we can at least take solace in knowing that nothing like that could ever happen in real life.
Or could it?
To be honest, I don’t really care for the Saw series. The traps are creative, but they’re probably the only thing the franchise has going for it. The plots are convoluted, the characters are either bland or contrived, and most of the premises are extremely flimsy. Of course, this really isn’t the fault of Saw, as it’s a problem I have with most slasher films: they’re all about the murders and nothing else.
I don’t really want to go into detail, and quite frankly, I don’t have too. Young Author Adam of Your Movie Sucks does a good job eviscerating all seven movies of the franchise.
Friday, October 9, 2015
Last week, we saw what our favorite Disney characters would look like as zombies. But what if, instead of being the walking dead, they were the ones fighting the walking dead?
Kasami-sensei seems to have answered that question with his The Walking Disney series. You can view his entire gallery here, but here are a few of my personal favoritesg from his collection:
Thursday, October 8, 2015
Wednesday, October 7, 2015
If you’ve never heard of Sally Cruikshank, chances are, you’ve seen her work. She’s an animator who created a few animated shorts for Sesame Street, and even an animated sequence from The Twilight Zone Movie. But perhaps her most famous (or infamous) work, which was reviewed by Chad Rocco, is “Face Like A Frog”, which features “Don’t Go In The Basement” by Oingo Boingo:
Tuesday, October 6, 2015
You’re a battered housewife. Your husband purchased a fresh slab of liver from the butcher. He wants you to prepare it for dinner, and it better be good—or else! So you cook the liver while he’s at work. You decide to try a bite to see if it’s good. It is. It’s more than good: it’s heavenly! You decide to try another bite. And another. And another. And then—oh no! You’ve eaten all of the liver! Your husband will be home shortly, and you don’t have the time or money to buy another liver. You look out your window at the church across the street. You’ve heard that there’s a body being housed there for a funeral tomorrow. It’s then you come up with a creative (if not, desperate) idea.
Monday, October 5, 2015
It's been a while since I made one of these posts about my favorite video game music--and hey, since it's Halloween, why not make them about scary video game music?
So to keep with the Halloween spirit, all of my VGM Monday posts this month will be related to scary video game music. And what better way to start of this month than to share the very first scary music from the very first video game I ever played?
Sunday, October 4, 2015
Word to the wise: if you go to a new town, and everyone there tells you not to stay out at night because seventeen other people have been found dead? Do. Not. Go. Out! And especially don’t go to the only restaurant open at night. You do not want to go in there. Not because the food is bad, mind you, but because—well, it’s better if you didn’t know. Too bad Harold here in this comic had to find out the hard way. You could even say it was a real pain in the neck for him!
I’m sure most of you had quite the reaction to Big Mac’s appearance in this week’s MLP episode. Perhaps you were busting a gut in laughter all through the episode. Perhaps you were cringing in horror to the point where your skin fell off. Or maybe a few of you became so enraged at the “transmisogyny” that you took to Tumblr to vent your anger over how this episode was “oppwesing the transwomanz!” (Just kidding! None of you would be that stupid, though plenty of SJWs have been.)
Regardless of how you reacted to Big Mac in drag, I’m pretty sure you exhibited at least one of these seven reactions as showcased by the Nostalgia Critic:
Saturday, October 3, 2015
Hey, did you ever want to see Creature from the Black Lagoon turned into a second-rate musical? No. No you haven’t. Nobody ever did. And yet Universal Studios Hollywood made it into one anyway—and unsurprisingly, it only lasted nine months.
Despite having such a short lifespan, this B-movie of a musical based on an actual B-movie managed to rub many park guests the wrong way. For SpazzMaster, it even managed to turn him over to the dark side and almost go Freddy Kruger. You can see him unleash his impotent fan boy rage in the following review/rant of the show (Part 1 and Part 2):
Consider this a retraction. Last year, I claimed that the very first horror film ever was Thomas Edison’s 1910 adaptation of "Frankenstein." I was wrong. That was not the very first horror movie. The first one was actually “The Haunted Castle”, and it was filmed 14 years earlier in 1896.
Friday, October 2, 2015
I’m sure most of you are familiar with Marvel Zombies. It’s exactly what it sounds like: a virus infects the entire Marvel universe, turning everyone, including the Marvel superheroes, into the living dead. Now that Disney owns Marvel, one has to wonder what would happen if the virus were to spread into the Magic Kingdom.
DeviantART user leagueof1 seems to have pondered just that, and has perfectly envisioned what it would look like if our childhood died and came back to life as the walking dead. You can view his entire gallery here, but here are few of my favorite of his pieces:
If you ever find yourself driving down the highway alone late at night and starting to feel hungry, whatever you do, don’t stop by the lone diner on the side of the road. Just don’t do it! It’s not because the food they serve there is bad. It’s just what—or rather, who—the food is made out of, and if you’re not careful, you might find yourself as the daily special!
Thursday, October 1, 2015
As with previous Blame The Fright months, I’m starting off this month with something mildly creepy as to better prepare you all for the more hardcore horrors later on. This first entry is more “creepy” in the supernatural and unexplained sense. Remember, if you see something, say nothing, and drink to forget. Welcome To Night Vale!